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So you dream of a feeling. That's your desire, and yet somewhere between desire and manifestation of that desire, we find ourselves lead astray. in most cases we fall completely short of recognizing the message our feelings bring for us to understand where we have been mislead.
Heres a BIG secret, your intentions can change unconsciously in an instant. this is where we must prioritize our focus because in every moment that one is unconscious of their intention, they make possible for spirits of all varieties to use their vessel as a marionette.
What we are doing as initiates is bringing consciousness (light) to the unconscious (dark/shadow) regions of our mind, effectively transmuting the darkness and rendering unwelcome influence powerless. Thus making ones self WHOLE!